With liberty from underwear for all…͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏
| | THE birddogs PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE | | Every morning, our boss Peter makes us recite an oath of loyalty to the birddogs brand. | | The birddog pledge is strictly nonpartisan. | | We hold no political beliefs outside of the endorsement of government subsidies for high speed internet in rural America. | | Peter included a clause in the pledge that said we can't be friends with anyone who doesn't wear birddogs. | | He even made Spencer break up with his girlfriend because she called our marketing sexist. | | Hoff always says "Amen" after the pledge because he assumes he's been added to yet another religious cult. | | Hoff's highly impressionable... this is like the fifth cult he's joined. | | Peter tests our loyalty by making us recite the pledge in a Lululemon store for hours without getting aroused. | | Part of the birddogs pledge of loyalty is a promise to never unionize. | | It's technically illegal, so Peter just makes us say it out loud once a week. | | No longer want to receive these emails? Unsubscribe. birddogs 520 Madison Avenue New York, NY 10022 | | | | |
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